My Struggle with Sin

As I am striving towards Christian maturity, many things have become much clearer now. For one thing, I am more sensitive towards sin; that is to say I now am convicted of things (which are not sins in the past) to be - sins. No, I ain't getting scrupulous. Some call this condition: "being sensitive to the (Holy) Spirit".

If you are thinking it's getting easier for me to be holy, let me assure you the hill to holiness has just got steeper! Somehow, EVERYDAY there will be something to tempt me to sin or at least lead me to comtemplate into sinning. Although God's abyssmal forgiveness gives me comfort, my sinful nature takes God's forgiveness for granted.

Whenever I take God's forgiveness for granted; I sink deeper into sin. Taking every opportunity to sin, accumulating filth. And it takes the fear of being judge by friends (during Holy Communion) for me to go for Confession. Ironically the motivation for me going to Confession is fueled by sin, which is - pride. It amazes me how God writes straight with crooked lines!

Confession fueled by the wrong motivation may come to be insincere or half-hearted but the grace channeled through this sacrament and received (however little) will induce a change in that person's life; in this case - me.

God is constantly molding me, helping me build better spiritual "muscles" and bear good fruit (Galatians 5:22-23) . The change might be just 0.01% a day... not much but it's at least something to work on! Hehe. ;) As I have mentioned above, it's God's forgiveness that I took for granted, but I must also add that it's because of God's kindness presented through His abyssmal forgiveness that made me turn back to Him...

It's Your kindness Lord, that leads us

to repentance

Your favor Lord is our
desire

It's Your beauty Lord, that makes us
stand in silence

And Your love, Your love is better than
life
"Kindness"; Written by: Louie Giglio, Jesse Reeves & Chris Tomlin
(C) 2000 WORSHIP TOGETHER