My First Paycheck

Just to update you guys on what I have been up to these days. Well recently I had my first taste of the corporate world as a "Corporate Marketing Executive"; which involves calling a selected many of business people to offer them opportunities to sign-up for our management training programmes. A stressful job this is because not everyday will be a smooth one. And although it does not require much physical effort, it requires much mental effort especially when it comes to pitching (marketing the product). So at the end of the day, I go home tired and it's the same cycle all over again the next day. But the good news is, I received my first paycheck yesterday! Yippee! It was not much but then again being in the working world made realised a few things...

That money is truly - HARD EARNED! I never realised this fact until I started working and this made me felt guilty when I thought of the times I pester my parent to get me this and that, without considering the fact that money is really hard to come by.

That being in the coporate world - CHALLENGES MY CHRISTIAN FAITH! I used to think that "how difficult can working life be?" until I started working myself. Blessing myself with the sign of the cross and praying in public with my colleagues around me was a task that I find difficult initially. I felt that others were watching me and I was worried of how they might perceive me. In short; I was more conscious of myself than of the omnipresent God that surrounds not just me but the whole universe He created.

That there is an - URGENT NEED TO SPREAD THE GOSPEL! Don't everyone know Jesus? The answer is no. Although they might know Jesus as some historical figure but not many know that He is the Son of the Living God! As I work among my fellow colleagues everyday, this truth manifests more and more.

The solution? Look up Romans 10:13-15

"for, 'Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.' How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, 'How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!'"

Peace. <><

My Trip to Sabah

   
     Not too long ago, in the month of April, a friend of mine from Lifeline suggested that I might like to go to Kota Kinabalu (KK), Sabah for the 5th Sabah Catholic Charismatic Renewal which was to be held in the month of June. At the thought of that idea, I was quite hesitant of going to Sabah because I am not the type that enjoys conferences. But after some thought and a lot of consideration, I decided to take on the offer because I reckon that I needed a vacation anyway. And praise God I was not alone, Jude (Antoine), James, Janice and Anne were also going to KK for the conference.
 
     Apparently, there was more in-store for us. Just two weeks before leaving for KK, I was informed that we were scheduled for a trip to the interiors, which is to Kampung Wasai (in the rural part of Sabah) for a mission trip. What's more, we are to prepare a skit for the camp in Bundu Tuhan! So being the blur person that I am, I went with the flow. Although I was quite overwhelmed by what was in-store for us, I was also equally excited on the journey we are about to embark on.

    Two weeks passed and on Thursday, the 17th June at around 6.00pm we arrived in KK. We (Jude, James, Janice, Anne & I) were received warmly by our Lifeline KK friends (Felix, Walter, Jason & Melinda) and were brought to the Tanjung Aru Beach for fresh coconut juice and to feast on Char-Siew chicken wings and satay. I was famished and walloped most of the chicken wings and satay, while the others took nominal bites of food. Dinner was over and we proceeded to Sacred Heart Cathedral for the weekly cell group meeting, where members gather to pray, read Scripture, worship and fellowship. During the cell group meeting Jude was invited to give a sharing and when he was asked "why God works through self-centered faith healers"; he gave this answer:
 

"God works through self-centered faith healers not for the sake of the faith-healers but for the sake of His people that are longing for His healing touch. Just as in the Gospels, Jesus used a donkey to meet His people. Now in modern times he uses whomever that allows Him to work through. If we are not happy with the 'donkey' as in the case of self-centered faith healers, ask God to let us be a 'donkey' then, so that He can use us to work His miracles through. God puts the passion in our hearts so that we would take action and make things right."

     After cell group, we proceeded to a shop in Luyang ran by a talkative yet adorable auntie for Tuaran Mee with sweet & sour pork ribs and also Susu Leung Fan Peng (which was basically, iced evaporated milk with grass jelly), both specialties of Sabah. We had our fill and we headed back to our respective residence: Jude to Dr. Jeff's house, Janice & Anne to Gloria's house while James & I to Roddy's house. Praise God, we were very well taken care of.

     East Malaysia is very peculiar compared to West Malaysia, for one fact: the sun rises really early – at 5.30am. So at 5.30am we have the sun shining, bright & warm. The day only started at 12pm when both James & I were picked up by Donovan (from Lifeline KK) to join the rest (Janice, Jude & Anne) for brunch at Apiwon Coffee Shop before proceeding to St. Simon's Church to register for the Catholic Charismatic Renewal (CCR). The registration process did not take long and very quickly we had the whole day to ourselves! So Alister (also from Lifeline KK) decided that we should go and visit the town of KK and we were brought to Centrepoint (which was a shopping mall) and also to the Filipino Market (where tourists haggle when buying souvenirs). On the overall, our field trip was very fruitful; Janice bought extra rolls of film & a T-shirt, while I won a pair of 'Bob the Builder' size 6, cushioned baby slippers from the arcade. It had been a long day, and we were quite tired so we decided to go back to our residence to take a shower before heading for the Opening Eucharist of the CCR in Sacred Heart Cathedral.

     The Opening Eucharist started off with Chinese drummers followed by liturgical dances, which was a fusion of Sabah’s culture. The Eucharistic celebration was very charismatic – with songs derived from the our Pentecostal brethren and "free worship" (or what was called, "new song" in Sabah) where all are invited to praise and worship God in their own unique way, with either tongues or shouts of praises. That was the first time, I saw the use of tongues during Mass and it was a new and refreshing experience for me in particular. The Opening Eucharist marks the beginning of the 5th Sabah CCR Conference.
 
     On the 19th June, we had our first session with Mr. Ralph Martin and it was my honour to be graced by his presence. Although the talks by Mr. Martin were humourous as well as insightful, the reason for me being honoured was not because of that; rather it was his humility that caught my attention and earned my respect as well as many others. It is hard to imagine that someone with such a high profile like Mr. Martin is so down-to-earth. Throughout the 4 days of CCR Mr. Martin touched on topics, which were often, either overlooked or forgotten, among them are topics like: "The Judgement" and "The Call to Evangelize".
 
     A couple of days later we were all set and ready to go on our scheduled mission trip to Kampung Wasai. Unfortunately, we were told the last minute that the intended vehicle was unavailable, thus the mission trip was cancelled. Although it seemed at that time we were unable to make a mission trip, the Lord has greater plans for us to turn our trip into a mission.
Before I go on further, I would like to give a brief introduction on Freedom Camp. Freedom Camp was inspired by the Holy Spirit to the leaders of Lifeline KK and was based on Galatians 5:1 :

"For freedom Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery."    

     As this verse from Galatians suggests, the main purpose of Freedom Camp is to help others to allow God to break the “chains” (bondage to sin or addictions) in their lives. And truly I tell you this proved to be a prophetic camp.

     Friday, 25th June was the day we were scheduled to go up Bundu Tuhan (a highland very close to Mount KK). Half of the team went up during the mid-day, to prepare for the camp later at 9pm and I was one of them that went up in Roddy’s Volvo. Roddy (from Lifeline KK) was driving, Jude in the passenger seat, while Caroline (also from Lifeline KK) and I were at the back seat. The trip to Bundu Tuhan was approximately 2 hours and that made good fellowship time for us!

     We were halfway up the mountain and the Volvo overheated and the temperature meter was at it's maximum. Fortunately, Roddy took notice of that and we stopped by the nearest residence (by the road) to seek for assistance. Everyone got out of the car and took a look at the engine, lo and behold; one of the rubber pipes that were responsible for cooling the engine had a crack on it! But Praise God, we managed to had it fixed with the help from the people of the residence, which was Catholic too! As soon as the car was fixed we were on our way up to Bundu Tuhan, but a while later as Roddy observed the temperature meter - it went up! To cut the long story short, Roddy's Volvo overheated and we had to drive back down to KK, but the weird thing was… the car’s temperature remained normal on the way down! Oh by the way, did I already tell you that when we stopped at the first residence, we were informed that there was a landslide at Bundu Tuhan, and no one could pass through!
Was it all a coincidence? I think not.

     On the same afternoon Felix's four-wheel-drive had a flat tire and had no choice but to abandon the four-wheel-drive - full of musical instruments, so to hitch a ride with a descending tour bus to seek help. What’s more, Melinda's car initially failed to start but thanks be to God! After much prayer and faith, the car was on the move.

     3 problem cars and 1 landslide, we are not going to take any chances, we headed straight back to Sacred Heart Cathedral to pray against the spiritual forces that were trying so hard to stop us from going up Bundu Tuhan. The Freedom Camp team arrived at SHC at about 10pm or so and to be honest - we were all very exhausted. But even so, we prayed fervently as a family against these spiritual forces!

     I recalled that, Jude mentioned the reason why Mr. S A Tan (go figure) unleashed its minions at full force is because this camp has really important people coming for us to minister to, who will also be able to make a difference in this world! If we look at this in retrospect, it’s quite a compliment Mr. S A Tan gave don’t you think? Anyway, after much prayers and intercessions, we went back to our respective residence to take a rest, so to prepare for our journey up the mountain early morning on Saturday.

     5.30am and we started our journey up to the mountains. Praise God, by the time we were halfway there, we receive the good news that the landslide had been cleared and there was a single lane passage to Bundu Tuhan. On the way up to Bundu Tuhan, we could feel the cold mountain air on our faces and Mount KK was so close we could see the deep sharp creases on it, as well as the rushing waterfall. It was beautiful. We arrived at Bundu Tuhan safely at about 8.30am, unloaded our luggage and boarded the rooms.

     Although the leaders were somehow worried that time would be the restricting factor since the whole Friday night was lost, but that was how God made a difference – even on the first day it self. Jude conducted an "opening" worship session soon after breakfast, at first I was expecting the usual flow of worship: people clapping, dancing and to leave with a pleasant feeling. But that was not quite how the worship went.

     We started with a praise song, with all the clapping and dancing but gradually we went into worship. The worship was intense (and so was the wind, which reminds me of the Holy Spirit) and what I could remember was, a loud thud on my right and another thud on my left. When I opened my eyes, I see two of the participants lying on the carpeted floor peacefully and in my heart I was going like, 'Wow. It was not even the "healing session" and yet there were people resting in the spirit – before anyone laid hands on them' And I assure you, what you read is just the tip of the iceberg.

     Night came and we were up in the conference hall waiting for the next session. Jude went up the stage and explained that during this session, we were to write down on a small piece of paper; the sins that we want to be repentant of and nail it on the wooden cross close to the stage as an act of faith, two by two. The conference hall was lit by only the overhead projector and four tea lights. Slow and somber worship songs were sung in the background, as the participants went up two by two (while being prayed over by two facilitators). Although I was a facilitator for the camp but I was one of the first to go up to nail my sins to the cross.

     The cross was laid on the ground. On my knees, I crawled to the cross in repentance and took the nail from the side, fasten the piece of paper and pondered reflectively on my sins before I hammered with courage. It was several hard knocks before I released the hammer. Nailing that piece of paper on the cross signified my decision to turn away from sin. Two by two the participants went up to nail their sins to the cross and proceeded for the praying over. The mood was sorrowful as we reflect on the sacrifice Jesus did on the cross for us all. There was were people weeping, praying fervently, singing in silence as well as behaving nonchalantly but there was no doubt that the Holy Spirit was definitely at work.

      After everyone took turns nailing their sins on the cross, Jude went and held the cross up high and requested everyone to surround him as to lift the cross together. This I believe is a reminder, that all of us were responsible for our sins and thus the crucifixion of our Lord Jesus Christ. It was a very emotional moment and the climax was when we sung the chorus of "Above All": 

"Crucified! Laid behind a stone. He lived to die, rejected and alone. Like a rose trampled on the ground. He took it all and thought of me, above all…"

     We brought the paper-laden cross to the outdoors and stripped the pieces of paper off the cross, collect them in a metal bucket and ignite the "sinful" pieces of papers… With campers in the background singing "The Wonderful Cross". It was the Lord that made this night possible to prepare us of what was to come on Sunday.

(Oh by the way, the reason why this camp was a prophetic one is because the theme for the camp which was Galatians 5:1 was the reading for Sunset Mass. And yes, it was not planned.)

     Most of us woke up way past breakfast, at about 9am because we slept late the night before at about 1 or 2am. Breakfast lasted for half an hour or so and soon it was time for our next session with Jude, which was on Morning Prayer and the story of Daniel's three friends: Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. But the focus in this memoir I am writing is not about the Morning Prayer or Daniel's three friends, rather it was on the session afterwards; which was the "healing session".

     The healing session started off as a worship session with the flow of praise and then worship. (After I saw the power of God on Saturday morning I was very certain now He is going to send a revival to His people) There were a number of people that were quite unresponsive to the sessions during the camp and God had put a passion in my heart for one of them, which happened to be a sibling of a friend – Q.

     Q was very unresponsive as well as nonchalant even though the worship was coming to its peak. Q's lips were syncing to the words of the song but there was no sign of responsiveness. On seeing that, the Lord increased the burden in my heart and moved me to stretch out my hand discreetly towards Q at about a few feet away, to pray for Q. I was praying for Q's salvation & responsiveness to the Lord, in tongues and it was intense. I was quite a distance away from Q, but I believe that God will work through me by the faith that I have in Him.
     
      Truly, the Lord did. It was a miracle. Q broke down and was kneeling on the ground with head bowed. As soon as Q broke down, I too broke down and wept; and was praying in tongues even more fervently. My weeping was of mixed emotions, joy with sadness; joy on seeing Q being responsive but on sadness, I do not know for sure. To be honest, I was wailing more than weeping; it sounded bitter. It was my first time to wail in public.

     I am a prideful person, as I told some of my friends; if my pride was something physical, I would have blown up long ago and my body parts all over. (Hehe, to give you an idea of how much my pride was) And of course being a prideful person, crying in public was the last thing that I would do, but I guess that was what the Lord wanted me to experience so to break my pride. Strangely, instead of feeling humiliated, I felt released and comforted. I was also – healed. I am still the same prideful person as I was before - but with my pride suppressed.

It was true to what the Lord had said He intended to do:

"Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it?" (Luke 15:4)

He touched everyone and left no one behind. 
 
     Although I came to Sabah to give, but I did also receive. I received the gift of new tongues (basically my tongues evolved) as well as healing from the Lord, blessings from the people of Lifeline KK and also new friendships. And never did I think that the Lord could minister to me while I was ministering to someone else. My trip to Sabah lasted for only 13 days. But the friendships forged and the experiences gathered will definitely last me for a lifetime.

PRAISE GOD!